Unquote

I just heard the obese lesbian roommate say to somebody on the phone:
"I can make bacon anytime I want."

Her brother's buying my bed! Cool. I used the magic influence words from The Definitive Book of Body Language on him. They are:

discovery
guarantee
love
proven
results
save
easy
health
money
new
safety
you

I use these words in job interviews, negotiating, in ebay listings . . . anytime I can, and they tend to work. You will love the results you get and the easy discoveries you make as these money words guarantee you new safety, health, and love. The only other thing I would add is the person's name - definitely use their first name, and also their first and last name if you have the opportunity without sounding contrived. It makes the person think you know them well.

Stats

My ebay auctions just finished. Here's the statistics.

33 of 34 auctions sold
Bids total: $929.86
Highest bid: $165.50

I'm always bewildered what items go high and what goes low. But it all averages out and I did pretty good this round. I have a few more books I may do in a couple weeks or I may just take them to the used bookstore.

Random Horse Pill Entry

I'm still waiting for a Harold & Kumar 2 torrent that ain't no dud. There's a review on the imdb = positive! So I have expectations.

"/

Stats on my ebay auctions:
20 of 34 have bids
Bids total: $144.44
Bids: 47
Highest bid: $60.55
Time left: 4 days

I think I'm gonna raise my estimate to about $600, maybe even $700.

^^

Last night I watched Colbert Report for the first time in a while. I stopped watching after I attended a live taping last year. It seemed to lose its magic like Oz the man behind the curtain not so great and powerful. But it's still pretty funny. Last night the guest was Jesse Ventura, who couldn't keep up with Colbert's wit. The guest at the show I saw was Jeannette Walls. Her book The Glass Castle is still in the Amazon top 100 (one year later). I haven't read it.

*__*

Today I got a shipment from Vitacost. They're one of my favorite mail order companies. But in the shipment they accidentally omitted my shampoo and included a jar of Horse Chestnut Complex 700 mg pills. I called and told Vitacost and they're gonna send my shampoo and let me keep the horse pills no charge. I popped one half hour ago. It's supposed to improve my "circulation" (wink wink). *Are these made from horse*

Ebay Hell 2

Oy, 33 new Ebay auctions up. 58 out of 59 of the items from the last group have been shipped (just waiting for 1 douchebag to pay). I could never work in mail order because this shit is work! But this round should be the last one and even though it's only 33 auctions I estimate another $500 at least from these ones.

I can relax till next Sunday.

Then the shipping nightmare begins again.

Next things to sell: hard drive, plastic storage bins.

Then bed (but keep mattress for a while), printer, desks, dresser, then finally love seat and mattress, leaving me with only clothes and laptop. Nice!

Friday through Sunday are my weak days for blogging - they're the days I have the most time and (paradoxically) the least. I'll try to stay on top of blogging this week. Even though I no longer have readers, I like the sound of one hand clapping.

Ebay Hell

My 59 Ebay auctions are over, clocking in at $744.95. After fees and fees and fees I'll probably walk away with about $650, which is fine by me. But god, Ebay really gouges these days. They're like the Mafia of internet selling: yeah, they get results, but they take a cut when you put an item up, they take a fatter cut when it sells, and then they take another cut when you're paid through Paypal. Yet it's faster than craigslist and the only way to reach a national audience and sometimes people pay ridiculous prices for my crappy books.

Still waiting for some payments - as I'm writing this my largest payer just came through with $148 - still got plenty of shipping to do, and I may put up more auctions on Thursday (so they'll end Sunday night on a 10-day run).

After my parents brought all my crap up to San Francisco I realized I don't need it, I don't want it, and I'd rather turn it into money. All these pages and I get "book nausea" where I don't want to see any of it. I'm gonna seize on that before it goes away. I really like not having things. Plus it's one of the obstacles that's holding me back from moving on.

I even thought about burning all my old journals and homemade comics from my boyhood and teen years. Those are the most irreplaceable things I own.

I've decided to stay my hand for now and just store them at my dad's ... but maybe someday I'll have the balls to tear it all down.