Saturday, November 22, 2008

A Plethora of Filmgasm

Well, I haven't really blogged lately so let's do it! It's been very cold and I've run out of money till my paycheck Tuesday so what better reason to stay inside and blog?

First, let's post a few videos.

Here's Bush getting dissed by his political homies. It is indeed kind of sad.

Here's some ants. I told you they were cool.

I watched most of that documentary and there's some amazing cinematography.

And via John ("Don Juan") Glomer comes the trailer for The Wrestler, the new Darren Aronofsky film with Mickey Rourke.

Kind of fruity theme song but I like Aronofsky and Rourke.

Here's a hilarious Japanese ESL video I found.

Which led to this monstrosity.

I haven't watched a movie in forever. Here are my candidates for something to watch this weekend:
Iron Man, Dark Knight, Get Smart, or Tropic Thunder. You tell me what's best.

Alright, I'll blog more tomorrow or something.

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Blogger John said...

Fruity theme song? Clearly your ears are broken!

I'd watch The Dark Knight.

3:32 AM  
Blogger Cutup said...

too late, watched iron man.

8:14 AM  
Blogger John said...

Robert Downey Jr.'s douchestache lured you in, eh? Or was it Terrence Howard's lispth?

1:00 PM  
Blogger John said...

Your comment on The John Zone v 2.3 prompted me to do some Kevin McAuliffe Googling, because I remembered that was the name of the blog you guys mocked me on, because I've got a good memory like that, probably because of my British American roots. It took a bit of searching, but look what I finally found!


This is my favourite part:

"John - it's write, not rate. You don't get it at all." Haha. Did I really write "rate" instead of "write"?

I wish I could read the comments, but they're not cached. :(

5:53 PM  
Blogger Cutup said...

It's "catched" not "cached".

No, it's "caught" not "catched".

Damn it, quit stalking yourself, John, that's what me and kevin are for.

(it's "stocking" not "stalking")

6:39 PM  
Blogger John said...

The irony here is that I had a real-life stalker at work about a year ago and almost had to file a restraining order against him per the request of my manager, who eventually had to permanently kick him out of the store (but he still kept coming back in, and telephoning, for a while until they threatened to call the cops). He told the girl who works with me that he wanted to adopt me and have Thanksgiving with me and go on hikes with me and read the Bible together (I swear I'm not making this up - at all! It was the weirdest thing I've ever experienced).

I guess I just have that effect on people. First you and Kevin, then myself, then creepy, lonely old weirdos. Hopefully next time it'll be a really hot MILF or something.

6:50 PM  
Blogger Cutup said...

Ha ha, that's crazy!

We should hang out some time and you can tell me about it. What are you doing on Thanksgiving?

7:11 PM  
Blogger John said...

Man, I get a lot of weirdos where I work. When I had first started working, I had this really creepy customer telling me how I looked like DiCaprio "before he got fat" for Blood Diamond, and that he wanted to "shoot" me some time because I had "intense eyes" and that he's involved in the film industry and had just gotten back from opening up a casino with Ben Affleck and Matt Damon. He gave me his business card, and I'm thinking to myself that there's something seriously funny behind all this, so I go home and Google his name (as I always do with people, including myself) and the second page result - under his official website where he advertises himself as a Kung Fu dojo or something - is a news report on how he had been arrested in the early 2000s for molesting a number of underage male kung fu students at his home studio in the '80s, but he got off on a technicality (apparently one of the students had a relationship with him after he became of age, which rendered his testimony useless for some reason, even though he HAD been molested along with several other boys).

Anyway, it's not every day you can say a child molester has tried to lure you into his lair and a creepy old dude has tried to adopt you so you can read the Bible and have Thanksgiving together. I lead a blessed life! This kung fu dude actually just came back in a week ago. I'm friends with the co-manager who works there and we always joke about him after he comes in, because he always has some BS story about a celeb he's been hanging out with (last time it was Breakfast Club's Anthony Michael Hall).

7:22 PM  
Blogger John said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

7:22 PM  
Blogger John said...

Oh, but just for the record, I have had a few older women try to pick me up as well. Most of them are gross but there have been a few MILFs to balance out the creepy old gay men. We just get a wide variety of weirdos for some reason. A guy with tourettes was walking around one time last year screaming "I'M GOING TO KILL YOUUUUU" every time someone walked into the bathroom. Then a couple months ago, this crazy old woman paid for a book with a check, left the store with her purchase, then came back two hours later and ran over to the cash register, made the cashier give the check back to her, then tore it up in front of a (now very interested) crowd of customers while screaming "YOU'RE TRYING TO SPY ON ME! WELL YOU'RE NOT GETTING A GODDAMN THING! I'M NOT GIVING YOU THIS, YOU WON'T GET MY INFORMATION!" The manager told her she had to return the book if she wanted to cut up her check, but she didn't have the book with her, and he said if she left the store he'd call the police because she had just torn up her method of payment from two hours ago. Suddenly she goes into her purse, comes out with a crumpled fifty dollar bill, and throws it straight at him - then spat at him and ran outside, still screaming. A few minutes later she returned with the book and threw it at the cashier and ran outside again.

I should write a book about my experiences working there.

7:29 PM  
Blogger Cutup said...

You should have hung out with him. He could have taught you some kung fu.

7:32 PM  
Blogger John said...

I'm sorry I took over your blog with long-ish comments by the way. I'm sick with the flu and loaded on medication so I don't know what I'm doing. I also drank a bit of whiskey earlier which I realized afterward wasn't a good mix.

7:32 PM  
Blogger Cutup said...

In the future everyone will be John Ulmer for 15 minutes.

5:52 AM  

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